Jumping on New People

Dogs will grab at any excuse they can find to jump, and a new person is one of the most commonly used excuses. This jumping is nothing like that in the last post; they're not doing it to get around, they're doing it because they're dogs and they do whatever the want, gosh. If you invite a new friend over for a Halo competition/wine tasting extravaganza, as you so often do, your dog will be up on them like an escaping prisoner on a fence: quick and desperate. And if they aren't, they want to be.
Because I value the accuracy of this scientifically rigorous blog, I jumped on a new person just the other day, and I can assure you from my new home in a holding cell, it is definitely something that humans can't do. At least that's what my lawyer tells me.
(flickr photo Jumping Dog outside Tate Modern by dps; http://www.flickr.com/photos/dps/357218625/)

Insect Eating

Dogs and cats will occasionally swipe a fly out of the air, but if you have any pet lizards or frogs, you know they eat insects all the goddamn time. They eat insects for every meal. That's just nasty. What's wrong with them? Don't they know bugs are gross? Wouldn't they rather have a nice fillet mignon with a baked potato and caesar salad? Maybe a little wine? Some cabernet, perhaps? Apparently not. Seems they'd prefer to gulp down live larva and some cold water out of a rock.
You could never show up at a party chomping on a grasshopper. Unless they're covered in chocolate or something else that drowns out the taste of grasshopper. And even then it's still weird. Get some chocolate-covered raisins, you freak.
(flickr photo froglet eating a worm by her wings; http://www.flickr.com/photos/herwings/2123121403/)