Regrowing A Tail

There are certain animal skills that I can let slide. You know, give the old, "wow, I'm so impressed. Thanks for showing me that, animal" line and get back to my taco salad (extra taco, hold the salad). But tail regeneration is just too fucking much. Honestly, these lizards can have a part of their body ripped off and then miraculously grow it back, and they act like it isn't a big deal. Well it is. It's a goddamn huge deal. Most pets are just happy having tails, but lizards take their pet awesomeness one step higher with tail regrowth.
But not only can we humans not grow our tails back, we don't even have tails. Well, at least we can regulate our body temperature.
(flickr photo Lizard-best by aussiegall; http://www.flickr.com/photos/aussiegall/293621164/)

Drooling

What's the phrase I'm looking for, dogs? Oh yeah: What the fuck ? Drooling is disgusting. Stop it. You're not even drooling because you see something delicious and tasty, like say tacos and guacamole. You're just drooling for no goddamn reason. Well, I guess you're drooling because we humans bred some of you to look cute and funny by giving you extra loose skin around your mouth and jaw that allows drool to seep out in a way that it doesn't with other dog breeds and most other animals. So it's really not your fault, but still, stop it! It's gross.
At least carry around a little dog napkin so you can clean up after yourself.
(flickr photo drooling dog by Wrote; http://www.flickr.com/photos/wrote/1953628172/)